Posts tagged with “omsk”
Meet the Fox
See, I am not a wolf. I'm not a bear either, nor a tiger or a lion. What I prefer shadowy, stealthy action, where I am supposed to be is behind the curtains, only revealing myself for a brief and well planned strike before vanishing for good. I am not a front line warrior and fighting in melee with force and bloodlust has no charm over me. I am coldblooded and sly and that is the way I like myself to be. Until recently, my golden bet was a cat. Yet in a conversation with a friend it stroke that a cat brings an undesired trait on table: a cat is female.
A fox possesses all the qualities of a cat, but it is male. It's nible, it's subtle, it's cunning. It hunts with trickery and ambush rather than brutal force. Yet it is bereft of any feline feminism. It is a he. I have never been a sexist, but there certainly is some romantic appeal of two genders' existence. Different in a sense, but not comparatively different. No single one is inferior, neither one is superior. The two abstract images you can tell apart, equivalent, but not the same. Different flavours, not the abilities. I'm no longer shy about leaning to the cunning side whilst staying a male. I'm a fox.
08:01 | Comments | Tags: public, self-analysis, zoology, omsk, psychologyThe Name of the Dæmon
It's said that in order to defeat a dæmon, one has to weaken them by means of knowing their true name. The crafty sods often assume long names with scaring titles in an attempt to conceal their actual nature. Kerath the Unbreakable? Anatheira the Destroyer? Lirath of Helheim? Words carry the meaning, they create impressions, they build a false image of what would be a mere cat's bristling otherwise. Cut the name and you will free your perception of any infusion and misconception the fiend is trying to infest you with. Once trivialized, stripped of his deceiving verbal raiment, little more a dæmon is than a miserable quivering creature. Fetch a knife fast and offer it a swift journey through the wicked beast's throat for no carapace of fancy aliases will be there to prevent the bloodshed. Once an emotion can be named in full and correct qualification it immediately loses all of its holy immunity. You know what to do, right?
Now then, how am I called again?
04:53 | Comments | Tags: public, self-analysis, omsk, zoology, madness, demonTame the Hummingbird
Well met, newcomer. You came here in the quest of a hummingbird? A perfect choice, an avian tailored of true grace, a little joyful shard of life. But you are, hold on, a human, you claim? Why yes, you big, you prudent, your blue frost of reason against the red warm heat of feeling the bird possesses? Look, lad, your taming may not go as easy as you might have thought.
One thing, apprentice, to keep in mind. To bird, you're alien. Despite the fact you both breathe the very same air and in chests of both does a heart beat — there is a stunning abyss of differences in how you are fit in the world. Her needs neither equal yours nor are ones you may have easily predicted with bare logic. The very sight and thought mechanic varies between you two to such a great extent, that would embarass any the pinnacle of your imagination. Albeit, none is better and I urge you to abandon your game unless you take her as your peer. You came after her, all with your intellect and so-called sentience, still all that weaponry makes you no superior. Since you came after a hummingbird, you are in need in traits of her own. Learn to respect and learn the ways of her, lest simply to employ. Taming is much unlike just binding to your will. When you tame a bird, at the same time you do tame and bend your own self.
Be prepared, apprentice. No matter how much keen or tender you are, you shall fail. If you think you know what care and support are, I verily tell you — be ready to learn it anew. At first, all you'll bring will be unease and irritation, you are intruder, you are foreign, don't you forget that for a fraction of second. Your failures are going to be so numerous that you shall daily question your intentions, you will want to quit the deed for good. In fact, there must be a rock strong reason for the hummingbird to risk her freedom, to reach your hand instead of natural mate. And even in case there is, expect a heap of time to expire before a wall of tension between you two begins to shatter. Stack up patience and confidence is your desire, you shall be bitten, avoided, ignored, scared of. High chances are, you chose a wrong bird: the one that shall always prefer her wilds to your enlightenment. If so, forget, set free and find another. Make sure you never force the bonding, unless, of course, a stuffed hummingbird is your only goal.
And ultimately, should you succeed, a final trial lies before you. All ready, one last step is left, but don't you rush. The very bonding is a point of no return. Afterwards, there shall be no more of you per se, but the dyad only. Hence brace yourself to lose some of yourself before you do attempt to tame a hummingbird.
04:25 | Comments | Tags: relationship, love, omsk, public, zoology, self-analysisLike the Sea
Have you never seen the Sea in person? Tonight I am the Sea, pleased to meet you. Just you glance at me, I am vast and deep, what am I is much broader that what your eyes first catch. Within my depth there's place for wonders, for the unseen and unbelievable, it is both luring and warding away at once. The water is able to shapeshift, assuming any form you would ever dream of, depriving nothing out of possibility. However, continue looking over. My surface is but an interlace of myriads of various tiny waves, combining in an unique and everchanging texture. Oscillations are boring, predictable and repetitive you say? Consider this: the simple sines bundled together produce the great variety of music and sound you find engaging, touching, alive and masterpiece. And so am I, and my complexity does give birth to a diversity of faces that you'll never get tired to count. From still to gale, from rounding any roughness on my watery skin to sinking ships with hellish craze, I am diverse, yet I am the one. Why come to me, all that that unstable? You come for I am tender, for I am caring, for I support. Be I in calm or storm, regardless of whether I produce some tiny ripples or the mighty tidal waves — you'll find your peace whence entering my waters at any time. My liquid essence penetrates any clothing and any mask, it takes after you in every a respect, it follows any of your moves but does not remove the freedom of motion. When swimming, I have you embraced, and you are mine and you are safe.
But what do I ask in return? What do I expect from a devoted one? The answer is amazingly simple: trust and fearlessness. Sure, you are free to paddle in the shallows, but there shall be no smooth transition onto the deep water. I require, I demand, I ask, I welcome you to cast away any slightest qualms and make a bold step right away from the solid ground. You may have seen people swim, you may know for sure that salty water will not allow you to sink no matter what you do, still you are hesitating and I do fully acknowledge this. Why would I want a craven in my embrace anyway? Play safe, stay away from the depth, build up courage and confidence, there is no hurry. I may offer my help, advice or anything akin to it, however, nobody is to determine your readiness except for your own very self. One day will you break that quailing coil and may fully enjoy joining my tender waters.
11:25 | Comments | Tags: public, relationship, omsk, personal